pimps and catholics
There was a nightlight in the room. A bright fuschia gleam to go with exalted wall to wall pink. I was lying there in the suitor's guest room, which was decorated for his eight year old niece when she came to stay there for a short while. He was in his old room in the Catholic house probably knocked out from our late night viewing of Hustle and Flow.
My feet were twitching, perhaps from the bottomless pots of tea sipped, sipped, and sipped all day long with his folks and old friends from the 'hood.' It was one of those days that made me feel like both a complete grown-up and a total kid. Sitting down for dinner with the suitor and his 'rents. A proper meal with proper conversations. Pot roast. Steamed greens. Dinner napkins. Harrison Ford movies. Michael Caine. Who's Bruce Campbell? Olympics. Ice skating hopefuls. Dessert, coffee, to be followed by a lazy boy while Mrs F insisted on doing the dishes. Now, you tell me how I'm going to low ride in that chair while the lady of the house, the same lady who made dinner, is soaking and scrubbing. So what do I do? What I do best in awkward moments, stealth. Why don't you two go out and get a movie, she says.
We do. Then we drive thru the golden arches for some of their golden fries. We get back to his place, to an empty sink, centerpiece back on table and beds made to mess up. His dad still looking up Lotto numbers and mom in rollers.
His mom reaches for the DVD and asks if we got a 'rapper movie.' I start to stealth again. We watch hustlers flow and then I return to my pink room. I lay there willing for the light to dim. When you're a kid the dark is scary- you want to be able to see everything. When you're older you want to leave some things in the dark. This past weekend a light shed on the suitor. A light that showed him in a more natural state of being. Laid back in chairs, fixing VCR players (by pluggin it in) and turning chagrin as old friends refreshed stories of naked toothbrushing and second story jumping. Everyone gets to be a pimp when they go back home. In that light was warmth and it's always been there but now I know where it all comes from.